Beyond Repair

What has gotten into her? He broke her heart, she cried. She picked herself up and started to live life again. Hurt followed her wherever she went. The sight of lovebirds tortured her. Seeing a recently ditched bit or girl, particularly those who didn’t have their shit together, calmed her a little bit. She went to then talked to them, consoled them and only then she felt a little happy in her heart: she wasn’t alone in this shit and there are people who are worse then her. 

But this feeling was fleeting and she didn’t know anyone new who had recently broken-up with his/her partner and whose life was in shambles. As a result, she couldn’t get her high from talking such people and this absence left her low, very low, emotionally. 

Exasperated, she wondered what went wrong between her and her boyfriend. And she didn’t find anything wrong with her. He broke up with her because he was angry with her or he didn’t understand her or she didn’t match her expectations or his friends thought she was a controlling bitch or she stole the money from his account or she was feeling lost and alone when he went on vacation with his friends or they didn’t talk to each other for a month or her monthly cycle matched with their fighting episodes. She didn’t have the answers but whatever it was it was not her fault.

 

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The Bitch and Me

I sat on a bench at the railway station and was eating my porridge. The bitch probably smelled the porridge and stood few feet away from me expecting me to give some portion to it. I tried to shoo her away. It moved back a little bit but came back, when I took a spoonful into my mouth. Few people, who sat the same bench where I sat, kept starting at me. Judged or not, I didn’t feel like sharing my breakfast with anyone, let alone with a bitch. But the bitch was persistent. I continued on eating. I didn’t try to meet the eyes of bitch. Once I saw into its eyes, I felt that I was heartless. But I didn’t give it to her demand. My worry was that why waste food on a bitch who may or my not like it. Or probably I was a selfish person who didn’t like to share his breakfast with a bitch.

Soon after, I looked around and found people staring at me in the same way exactly as the bitch was looking at me.

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